Understanding Anxiety
If you’ve ever asked yourself, Why am I always anxious? or Where does this feeling come from?—you’re not alone. Anxiety is one of the most common mental health challenges, affecting millions of people worldwide. But anxiety isn’t just about feeling stressed or overwhelmed. It’s deeply connected to the body, the nervous system, and past experiences.
Anxiety isn’t random, and it isn’t a sign of weakness. It’s the body’s way of signaling that something feels unsafe—whether physically, emotionally, or psychologically. For some, anxiety is situational, triggered by a specific event. For others, it’s a chronic state, something that lingers in the background no matter how much they try to “relax.”
To truly understand anxiety, we have to look beyond the surface and explore what’s happening in the nervous system, the brain, and even in past experiences that might have shaped the way we respond to stress.
Anxiety and the Nervous System
At its core, anxiety is a nervous system response. Your nervous system is designed to keep you safe, constantly scanning for threats—both real and perceived. When it detects danger, it activates the fight, flight, or freeze response, preparing your body to respond. Your heart rate increases, breathing becomes shallow, and stress hormones flood your system.
This response is helpful if you’re facing an actual threat, like stepping in front of a moving car. But when the nervous system gets stuck in high alert—often due to chronic stress, trauma, or emotional neglect—it can misinterpret everyday situations as threats. This is what creates chronic anxiety.
Some signs of a dysregulated nervous system include:
- Feeling on edge or hypervigilant
- Trouble relaxing, even in safe environments
- Racing thoughts and difficulty concentrating
- Physical symptoms like dizziness, nausea, or muscle tension
- Feeling disconnected from yourself or your surroundings
When anxiety becomes chronic, it’s not just about thoughts—it’s about the body struggling to find a sense of safety.
The Link Between Trauma and Anxiety
For many people, anxiety isn’t just about stress—it’s a symptom of unprocessed trauma. Trauma doesn’t have to mean a catastrophic event; it can also come from ongoing emotional neglect, instability in childhood, or even growing up in an environment where emotions weren’t validated.
Trauma disrupts the nervous system’s ability to regulate itself. Instead of moving smoothly between states of stress and relaxation, a traumatized nervous system often stays stuck in hyperarousal (fight-or-flight mode) or hypoarousal (shutdown, numbness, or dissociation). This dysregulation can make even minor stressors feel overwhelming.
Research published in The Journal of Anxiety Disorders (van der Kolk, 2014) has shown that trauma survivors are more likely to experience chronic anxiety because their nervous systems are conditioned to expect danger. Their bodies respond with anxiety even when there’s no real threat.
This means that if you struggle with persistent anxiety, it may not just be about your thoughts or daily stress—it may be your nervous system trying to protect you from something it once learned was unsafe.
Why Do I Have Anxiety?
Anxiety is complex and can have multiple contributing factors. Here are some common reasons why you might experience it:
1. Unresolved Trauma or Stressful Life Experiences
If you’ve been through a traumatic event or a series of stressful experiences, your nervous system may have adapted by staying in a heightened state of alertness. This is common in those who have experienced childhood adversity, emotional neglect, or significant life changes.
2. Nervous System Dysregulation
Some people’s nervous systems are more sensitive due to genetics, early life experiences, or chronic stress. If your body struggles to shift between stress and relaxation states, anxiety can become a constant presence.
3. Emotional Suppression and Unprocessed Feelings
When emotions like fear, sadness, or anger aren’t fully processed, they often show up as anxiety. Many people were taught to suppress their emotions growing up, leading to internalized stress that manifests as anxiety.
4. Perfectionism and High Self-Expectations
If you constantly feel pressure to perform, be productive, or meet unrealistic expectations, your nervous system may be in a chronic state of stress. This kind of anxiety is often linked to childhood conditioning, where love or approval felt conditional on achievement.
5. Chronic Stress and Overstimulation
Living in a fast-paced, overstimulating world can contribute to anxiety. Social media, constant notifications, and a culture that prioritizes productivity over rest all keep the nervous system on edge.
How to Begin Healing from Anxiety
If anxiety is rooted in the nervous system and past experiences, then healing isn’t just about changing thoughts—it’s about helping the body feel safe again. Here’s how you can start:
1. Regulate Your Nervous System
Because anxiety is a body-based response, working directly with the nervous system can help. Practices like deep breathing, grounding exercises, and vagal nerve stimulation (such as humming, cold exposure, or gentle movement) can signal safety to your system.
2. Process Unresolved Emotions
If anxiety is covering up deeper emotions, working with a therapist to explore suppressed feelings can be powerful. Trauma-informed therapies like Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic Therapy, or EMDR can help release stored emotional pain.
3. Build a Sense of Safety in Your Daily Life
Your nervous system needs consistent signals that you are safe. Creating predictable routines, engaging in self-compassion, and setting boundaries can help retrain your system to relax.
4. Shift Your Relationship with Anxiety
Instead of fighting anxiety, try seeing it as a messenger. Anxiety often points to something deeper that needs attention—whether it’s a need for rest, emotional processing, or a change in life circumstances.
5. Seek Support
If anxiety feels overwhelming, working with a therapist who understands nervous system regulation and trauma can make a significant difference. Therapy can help you uncover the root causes of anxiety and provide strategies to heal in a way that feels safe and sustainable.
Final Thoughts
If you’ve struggled with anxiety for a long time, it might feel like something is wrong with you. But anxiety is not who you are—it’s a response that your body and mind have developed in an attempt to protect you. It is possible to heal.
By understanding the nervous system, addressing unresolved emotions, and learning to create safety in your life, you can begin to move from a state of survival into one of true healing and calm. You are not alone, and you are not broken—your system just needs support to find its way back to balance.
- van der Kolk, B. (2014). The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma. Viking.
- Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-Regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.
- Siegel, D. J. (2012). The Developing Mind: How Relationships and the Brain Interact to Shape Who We Are. Guilford Press.
